George I

George I

George I, King of Yesterland, was an Earthling refugee from the Earth-666 iteration of reality. As one of the so-called False Kings, he would eventulaly bring misery and misfortune to the people of his newfound home. But the truth is that all George ever wanted was to make a name for himself and keep his family happy.

 

Born George Switzer in the year 1883 of his failed version of the universe, the future king was a traveling salesman who criss-crossed the United States selling all manner of products—or at least trying to. It wasn’t until the early 1900s that he stumbled across an item that even he, George, could sell. The Honeybear, inspired by the work of American and German toymakers on the so-called Teddy bear, came in all shapes and sizes. And kids just loved them.

 

Finally, George found himself some success. Then, of course, the world came to an end.

 

He was traveling home from a successful trip to England in April 1912 when the supposedly unsinkable ocean liner he was traveling on decided to go ahead and hit an iceberg. Luckily for George, a universe-ending Calamity came along at just that moment to sweep him into the purgatorial paradise known as Eden—along with the cat-shaped Honeybear he’d been toting around as a sample.

 

George married quickly and found himself the father of a baby girl, Gwendolyn, by year’s end. Then he did his best to be a good king to the people he was charged with ruling, but he was just about as successful at that endeavor as he’d been at selling things. And he never found even the one success he’d has a salesman while he was a king.

King of Yesterland
Reign
114–138
Predecessor
Title Established
Successor
Gwendolyn
Life
85 144
Children

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