Clarkwoods literary universe Evolution of the Bekiska Bikini Timeline

3037 BCE

Perfecting the Paint Job

Technological achievement

The Bekiskapan perfect the body paint formula which renders their skin impervious to most physical attacks—just in time to fend off an invasion from a neighboring culture bent on wiping them out.

3000 BCE

The Most Lamentable Tragedy of Achilles’ Nips

Discovery, Scientific

After years of successful conquest made possible by their innovative body paint technology, the Bekiskapan realize that no amount of paint makes their nipples impervious to damage.

They believe this is because of the relationship between nipples and child-rearing, that the nipples can’t be rendered impenetrable (even temporarily) without risking an individual’s ability to breast-feed.

To prevent further mammillary injury, the Bekiskapan develop armor-plated pasties—which they then paint over to obscure their weakness from enemies.

2700 BCE

The Right Piece of Cloth in the Right Place

Artistic creation

After three centuries of domination, Bekiskapan traditionalists are convinced by the younger generation to tap into the power of “cloth and flesh,” which the youth of the empire believe will help to distract the enemy, thereby shortening battles and decreasing casualties.

Bekiskapan armies begin marching into battle while wearing cloth garments for the first time. Designs vary widely, but the intended effect is achieved. The armies opposing the Bekiskapan collapse faster than ever before and casualties reach an all-time low.

1066

Chafe Mail

Technological achievement

After conquering most of Europe, the Bekiskapan begin a series of ultimately unsuccessful invasions of the British Isles. They are driven back each time by armies of Gillikin halflings, in what will be the last armed conflicts between the two species (human and halfling).

In tribute to their new allies, the Bekiskapan begin constructing their armor from scale and chain mail—halfling inventions on this version of Earth.

1914

Calamity Breeds Creativity

Era beginning/end

A universe-ending Calamity almost entirely wipes out the Earth-1 iteration of reality. The Bekiskapan and their halfling allies are among the survivors who take refuge in the purgatorial paradise of Eden.

While they wait for reality to reboot so they can return to Earth, the Bekiskapan armor-creation industry explodes with creativity. They create newly ridiculous ensembles based on each of the alien cultures they encounter, from the elves and dwarves to the shape-shifting kíndalla and the winged qhirat.