EdenNet | E. Christopher Clark


The EdenNet (or The EN) is the worldwide system of interconnected computer networks in Eden. A vast array of resources, products, and services are available via the EN, including Everything Ever Produced. And yet, though the creators of the technology call it “a ubiquitous information superhighway,” access to the EN is anything but universal. For a variety of reasons, EdenNet coverage is all but absent in The United Kingdom of Wonderland—meaning that nearly a fifth of the Edenian landmass is stuck in the technological dark ages.



The EN is based on similar technologies which were developed on Earth and on the dwarven homeworld of Thün Büldar. Originally conceived as a way to connect and share knowledge, the EN quickly devolved—as all massive networks eventually do. And for a time, it was little more than a forum for the survivors of the apocalypse to yell at each other and share pornography the likes of which the non-starfaring species had never seen. But that time did pass.


During the time of the so-called monster hordes, the peoples of Eden learned to use the EN to organize their resistance. With the arrival of the Everything Ever Produced initiative, everyone and their mother was given the chance to play the part of archivist and preservationist. And with events like the Raunchy Brawl and the Garden Games bringing Edenians together like never before, the future has never looked brighter for the EdenNet.


Unless you’re a Wonderlander, of course.



Access to the EN is made possible via a series of radio towers placed strategically across the world, on the five moons, and on the Pu Dijk space station. That said, the one place in Eden where you will not find EN towers is in Wonderland.


During The First Age, the then-influential White Mages of Wonderland lobbied the seven kingdoms of the Edenian south to prohibit the construction of towers on southern land. And though this was frustrating to the developers of the EN, it was only a showstopper in one of the kingdoms: the mountainous Highlands.


The EN development team knew that placing one or more towers amongst those lofty peaks was of the utmost importance, so they even offered to grow the towers with nature-based spells instead of building them from manmade materials. But though they tried valiantly, they were denied by the Highlanders at every turn. Only through years-long negotiations in The Garden were the developers of the EdenNet able to secure the rights to a single mountain, one which sat on The Highlands’ border with The Reek—and they were only granted that in the year 28 CE, in the aftermath of the Battle of Frankburg Bridge, as a gesture of goodwill toward the country of the late general Kester Thidos.


Accessibility & Affordability

Though the system is designed to be accessible on any computing device which might have found its way into the Eden, the preferred method of interaction and consumption are EEP Audiovisual Implants. These can be surgically installed into the temples of any sapient being for the low, low price of their privacy.


And their soul.

Access & Availability
Nearly ubiquitous
The Garden
Veyloft Heights
Popular Uses
  • Befriending like-minded weirdos across vast distances;
  • Arguing with strangers;
  • Sharing humorous memes about our feline overlords;
  • Playing increasingly convoluted word puzzle games; and,
  • Puns
Most Popular User
Glinda the Good
Least Popular User
Most Popular Search Term


Please Login in order to comment!
Jul 25, 2023 10:56 by Dr Emily Vair-Turnbull

The sidebar made me laugh a lot. Great article.

Emy x   Etrea | Vazdimet
Jul 25, 2023 12:29 by E. Christopher Clark

Thanks! Yeah, I was liking the article but feeling like it needed a few final jokes. So that's where they went. :-)

Now it's time for the awkward wave.
Jul 29, 2023 12:52 by Chris L

You got me with the porn sharing and the "and their soul" bit! Nice job there!

Learn about the World of Wizard's Peak and check out my award winning article about the Ghost Boy of Kirinal!

Jul 30, 2023 12:51 by E. Christopher Clark

Thanks, man!

Now it's time for the awkward wave.
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